Posted on Jun 4, 2024
In a world of disarray, where the winters are burning hot and the summers have turned cold, Keurig Dr Pepper dares to make a statement. The company is reintroducing Snapple Elements, their 1999 series of environmentalist-themed “fruit drinks”, just in time for the end of the world.
Will a crisp, cool beverage be enough to distract us from global warming? Probably not! But let’s at least figure out if they’re good drinks.
Posted by starsystemerror on Jun 3, 2024
Earlier this year, I had a job that had me sitting at a kiosk in a Walmart for hours a day, smiling at people, answering questions, and sometimes doing some actual work. Most of the time, though, I was thinking about inconsequential things, like the bizarre censorship of songs on the Walmart radio, or more often, what I’d be eating for lunch. Luckily for me, our good old Wally-World has a whole selection of grab-and-go food, both in refrigerators and under heat lamps. Since this job had me working full time in various Walmart locations, I’d taken notice of the many meal offerings the ubiquitous store has on display. At first, I was picking up salads and snacks, reluctantly eyeing the unappetizing and overpriced cold sandwiches, but then I realized…Walmart has hot food for sale. And I might as well finally try it.
The hot food at Walmart is not something I ever put much thought into, nor ever tried. I’ve eaten at fast food chains that happen to be located inside Walmart a few times, my desperate parents reluctantly letting me have a “healthy” Subway sandwich or even McDonalds as a treat after a grueling day of shopping. Never, though, have I tried anything from the hot counter at the deli, or god forbid, the ready-made bagged foods sweating under customer-accessible warmers. My standards for food as an adult, though, are simultaneously higher and much, much lower. It’s (mostly) cheap, it’s right there, and I’m stuck at work, I thought, so why not.
Walmart’s hot food offerings are split between two main areas. First is the deli counter, which requires social interaction and requesting an employee scoop you your nasty slop into a plastic container. This was a bit intimidating for me, as a Walmart Deli Noob, so I first opted for the grab-and-go style hot food, which was located in two spots: one warmer setup was right next to the main deli counter, and the other was more central, near the “running in to Walmart to grab something for lunch” section at the front of the store. Despite spending so much time in the store, I have never seen someone refilling either of these warmers, presumably because everything is cooked at 9 or 10 am, before I came in for work. The stuff you can grab without talking to any employees is simple, mostly fried food, in varying types of paper wrapping. There are several sandwiches, a couple processed-meat-tube-based products, and a few other surprises. The meat involved (none of these are vegetarian) is overwhelmingly chicken, as is the primary (and possibly only) meat available behind the counter. The reason for this is surely some convoluted arrangement of capitalism’s machinations, but on the consumer end, it’s mostly just an exercise in seeing how many forms of low-quality chicken meat you’re willing to tolerate, such as…
Posted by brilokuloj on May 26, 2024
I managed to catch myself at 275 tabs. Still way too many, but at least I didn’t get to 400. Time to clean my tabs!
Posted by starsystemerror on May 26, 2024
I went a few days without playing, since I kinda lost steam for this whole Hunt thing. I definitely didn’t plan on finishing, and I actually played more games than I expected to. Today (and tomorrow morning, but I have work) is the last day of The Hunt, so I figured I’d try the last few games I actually wanted to try before it’s over.
Posted by brilokuloj on May 17, 2024
I’ve been a fan of the Sonic the Hedgehog series for longer than I can remember. As far as I’m concerned, I might as well have been born clutching a copy of Sonic’s Schoolhouse.
That puts my engagement with the Sonic franchise roughly in the second half of the 90s; early enough to have opinions on the decline of the franchise, for sure, but just too late to have been around for the golden era of the games. (Honestly, as far as the true die-hard Sonic fans are concerned, the very first Sonic game was the only good one.)
This also makes me the exact right age to be utterly baffled by the popularity of Sonic.exe, the fandom’s beloved creepypasta since 2011.
Posted by brilokuloj on May 14, 2024
A couple days ago, my wife became enraptured by the existence of “gamblecore”, an aesthetic (perhaps a joke one? I’m too old, I can’t tell anymore) that seems to be trying to recreate the feeling of modern digital gambling machines – the lights, the coins, the stupid jingles. It’s really, really funny. It did get us talking about gambling, though.
My opinion on gambling is that every time I go to the mall, the closest entrance to the stores I frequent goes through the arcade. Every time I want to go to the mall for an overpriced pretzel, or overpriced hand creams on slightly less overpriced sales, I have to walk past the Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory machine. It is one of those fucking coin pusher games. It plays music from the movie, constantly. It is a nightmare beyond my wildest comprehensions.