Cleaning My Tabs #4

Posted by brilokuloj on Jun 12, 2024

I had “only” reached 320 tabs, but my computer was actually starting to slow down this time. I checked my memory, and sure enough, it was taken up by my literal hundreds of tabs. You know what that means.

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The Mysterious Tator

Posted by palabomeno on Jun 12, 2024

I consider myself to be kind of an aficionado of weird and obscure tarot. I like to collect decks that are straight up bad - the stupid tie-in decks, the ones aimed at kids, and especially the ones that are just badly made to sell to idiots for his lower prices possible. Today, I may be showing you one of the worst tarot decks I’ve ever experienced in my life, and when I tell you its name, you will believe me how bad it is right away: My copy of the Mysterious Tator.

The Mysterious Tator

Yes, that is its name.

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A Eulogy to Road Yogurt

Posted by palabomeno on Jun 10, 2024

Sometime in March, a half-full half-gallon of milk was thrown out of the window of a car on a highway off ramp.

For most pieces of litter, this would be the end of the story. But a half-full jug of milk is not your ordinary piece of litter. Who was drinking milk in their car? Why throw it out of your car’s window on the road? Why were you drinking milk on the highway? It was these questions that engaged us when we first spotted this milk jug, and we soon decided that this was somebody’s attempt to create “Road Yogurt”, a fermented milk product that involved leaving milk sitting on the side of a road.

Eventually, Road Yogurt became a character in its own right. This off-ramp was the off-ramp that led to our home, so seeing Road Yogurt became something of a tradition that meant we were home. Road Yogurt was our friend, and he always marked that we had finally ended our journey, no matter how far we had traveled.

Road Yogurt has known much strife and difficulty in his life, but never let it get him down. Being a bottle of milk on the road was hard enough, but his friendship and inevitable break-up with Piss Bottle was an especially low moment. Road Yogurt began to turn grey after this, and eventually a rancid, rotten brown, but he never gave up on being Road Yogurt.

As of June 2nd, 2024, Road Yogurt is finally gone. We have no way of knowing if Road Yogurt was finally disposed of, or if he just was moved away to place we can’t see. Either way, it’s all over. We’ll miss you, Road Yogurt. But we’ll never, ever forget you.

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The Enchanted Sacred Rubber Tree Sapling

Posted by brilokuloj on Jun 9, 2024

There is a Minecraft story as old as time, and it’s the Enchanted Sacred Rubber Tree Sapling. Supposedly, this is a tree with the power to melt technology and destroy worlds…

I have only heard these tales secondhand; in the early days of Minecraft, I was too intimidated by tales of mod incompatibility. Even running a Hamachi server with server-side plugins was too overwhelming for me at times. Nowadays, modding is much, much easier – but with these improvements, we lose the art that can come out of this beautiful jank, like server-killing trees.

That’s why I decided that the only thing I could do was see it for myself.

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Starbucks hates Starbucks

Posted by brilokuloj on Jun 6, 2024

When’s the last time you could afford a Starbucks coffee in this economy?

Don’t answer that. I don’t want to think about money.

Anyway, I think we can all agree that Starbucks is overpriced hot water, but it does occupy a captivating role as one of the few remaining Third Places in America. This is the reason I found myself entranced by the Starbucks subreddit, a space where both customer and employee come to bitch about their coffee.

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The 5 Legendary Snapples

Posted on Jun 3, 2024

In a world of disarray, where the winters are burning hot and the summers have turned cold, Keurig Dr Pepper dares to make a statement. The company is reintroducing Snapple Elements, their 1999 series of environmentalist-themed “fruit drinks”, just in time for the end of the world.

Will a crisp, cool beverage be enough to distract us from global warming? Probably not! But let’s at least figure out if they’re good drinks.

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