FOOD: Taco Bell – The Breakfast Crunchwrap Experience

Disclaimer: Due to the outbreak of the novel coronavirus, we weren’t really able to go outside and buy a Breakfast Crunchwrap to take photos of for our article. We’re making do with stock images from Taco Bell itself. Sorry.

Taco Bell is something that is almost, but not entirely, unlike real Mexican food. We don’t like to parrot talking points about “authentic” food here on Eggware.XYZ, but we really do have to admit that Taco Bell is as far detached from Mexican cuisine as Magritte’s pipe was to a real one. But there’s a certain beauty in it: in a sense, it is pure and authentic ‘American’ cuisine, representing everything that makes the modern United States of America the way it is: its cheesy-potatoey strengths, and its blatant disregard for the cultures it has built itself upon.

Most of the most interesting offerings on Taco Bell’s menu are those that don’t try to ape Mexican cuisine, but do their own ‘unique’ things. This is a tradition of theirs stemming all the way back to the Enchirito, a mashup of an enchilada and a burrito in one saucy mess. One of our favorite concoctions is the Crunchwrap Supreme, a kind of rethinking of a burrito that is folded into a hexagon around a tostada. 

The Crunchwrap is what Taco Bell is all about. It’s designed in a way that makes it more convenient to eat than a regular burrito of similar size, and adding a tostada for crispiness is a clever textural component. There’s nothing like it anywhere else. We don’t want to imply that this is good food, or even particularly tasty. It’s just one of the little ‘innovations’ that you get in fast food, the kind that Taco Bell specializes in. Since Taco Bell works with a different palette of ingredients than most other fast food restaurants – tortillas instead of buns, loose ground meat instead of patties – they have more liberty to experiment and create strange concoctions. 

First released as a limited time offer in 2005, the Crunchwrap Supreme was popular enough to be added to their full time menu in 2006 and has been there ever since. And since the Crunchwrap Supreme was so popular, when Taco Bell introduced a new breakfast 2014 they added a Breakfast Crunchwrap to it. This was the most brilliant thing that Taco Bell has ever done.

GAMING: Twilight Sparkle’s Secret Shipfic Folder [Postmortem]

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Twilight Sparkle’s Secret Shipfic Folder was a fan-made My Little Pony card game, released in Summer of 2014. It is also, for all intents and purposes, not the normal kind of thing that we would review on Efemerovo.

We here at Eggware.XYZ have something we must admit: we enjoy My Little Pony. We’ve enjoyed it for a long time, since our childhoods. We have enjoyed the latest series, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, since its inception. It is a good television show and an excellent franchise, one that hits all the right notes for its target market of young girls and people well outside it.

It’s not just little girls who love My Little Pony, though. They are those who call themselves “Bronies”. Adults, typically men, have flocked to the 2010 My Little Pony reboot in droves, and they brought a lot of their adult concepts with them. This has been a problematic development for a lot of the young fans of My Little Pony, as the primary resources for My Little Pony content are primarily made by adults, for adults.

Twilight Sparkle’s Secret Shipfic Folder was not for My Little Pony‘s target audience. So who was it for, really? After the jump, we’ll explore this game postmortem and delve into some of its more “adult” choices.

Warning: This article is much more mature than the content usually featured on Efemerovo. We discuss a multitude of topics, including sexuality, consent, and incest (uh, yeah, it gets weird). Use discretion and do not view if you are uncomfortable with the subject matter.