Posts Tagged ‘rats’

EGGWARE.XYZ: Rat Facts

Eggware.XYZ produces a NEW zine… One filled to the BRIM with facts about our favorite mammal, THE RAT.

RAT FACTS! Have you ever wondered to yourself, “what do rats do? What do they want? And why are they here?” Ponder no more! RAT FACTS has the answers you need! Do you want to know what a rat’s favorite food is? RAT FACTS! Need to know what rats do in their spare time? RAT FACTS! Do you have a pet rat and want to know how to get it to stop screaming in a human voice?* RAT FACTS! This informative little pamphlet is the DEFINITIVE, the ULTIMATE, and the DEFINITELY LEAST MADE UP of ANY rat information resource! Don’t hesitate! Don’t delay! And don’t screw this up!

Buy RAT FACTS NOW!!!!

*Stoppage of human-voice-screaming not guaranteed

REVIEWS: The Rat-Ron-Ratings

In case you fell asleep from the years of 1997-2007 or were otherwise lucky enough to be spared from the onslaught, Harry Potter is a quasi-beloved fantasy book franchise about a little wizard boy and his little wizard friends.

One of those kids is named Ron Weasley, who briefly had a pet rat named Scabbers. Pet rats weren’t very well-regarded by the general populace at this point, but around the release of the film adaptations, quite a few people found the little rat man quite charming and it quite inexplicably became profitable to sell rat-themed merchandise* to wee ones.

Then Scabbers turned out to be an old man pretending to be a rat to deceive the children, but that’s not relevant to this article. What we’re talking about today: SCABBERS MERCHANDISE! And uh, Ron too, I guess.

*Incidentally, this is an extended advertisement for my upcoming zine, Rat Facts. It’s facts about rats.

Read On…

CHATTER: Happy Holidays from Eggware!

Xmas Sonic 01

Even though Christmas Day may be ending tonight, we here at Eggware are so dedicated to the holidays that we will be celebrating them for an indefinite amount of time. Though this is partially because the Christmas sale season made us busy with our side jobs, this is also because we wish to share a little extra cheer for those who may not be able to celebrate the holidays, whether because of being busy or because of difficult home situations.
We hope that for those who were not able to have a truly jolly Christmas, we will help them feel the spirit of the season long after the day itself has passed.

For the next month and maybe more, we’ll be reviewing old holiday specials, reviewing seasonal food, and generally celebrating the spirit of winter. Up here at Eggware HQ, the winter doesn’t end very soon, so we feel that the end of the holiday spirit in January is unnecessary and abrupt.

Here in the Eggware household, Sonic and Tails have been very naughty this holiday season and we will be punishing them appropriately by forcing them to pose in our Christmas photo shoots. We hope you enjoy their misery. Read On…