Animal Crossing needs a Gay Wedding Season

Animal Crossing: New Horizons is a gay game. We’re not going to beat around the bush with that! It’s gay. If you play it, you’re gay. We’re not accepting arguments. Gay people love this game. Gay people love having their little animal friends and building an adorable little house and dressing up in silly costumes.

But the game is missing a quintessential part of being gay: getting married. In June, there’s been a “Wedding Season” event where you can help the alpacas Reese and Cyrus celebrate their anniversary with photographs. But Reese and Cyrus are – shock horror – straight. We can’t abide by this. How dare they put heterosexuals in our fun game! During Pride Month of all months! Disgusting. 

So we’ve tried to throw together our own way of handling a potential future Wedding Season. We think we’ve come to a few conclusions that everybody will like, and nobody will hate. Let’s get married!

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