REVIEWS: Twilight Sparkle’s Shapes

Princess Twilight Sparkle is one of the most magical ponies in the world of My Little Pony, and your best friend! And she wants to show you something – all the new shapes she can assume! Princess Twilight Sparkle has been working hard on her transmogrification abilities, and she’s now going to show you some of the best shapes she can take now! You don’t really have a choice in this. She will get very fussy if you refuse. Sit down and watch! Now!

Block

Princess Twilight Sparkle recently heard of this “Minecraft” thing everyone has been going on about, and she’s absolutely obsessed with it. She’s builded a towering 1x1x40 structure of sand that she can no longer climb back up on, a 3x3x2 dirt house that she covers up with more dirt, and our sources claim she’s even working on learning how to break trees!

In celebration of her newfound super-interest that she will not shut up about for any reason, she has chosen to transform herself into a block, just like from Minecraft! Her wings aren’t big enough to fly away, so she just sits on the floor until you pick her up and put her in your house. Then she whines at you until you throw her in your lava garbage disposal!

Hollow Pig

Okay, this one’s kind of weird and we don’t know why she did it, but we have to say it: Princess Twilight Sparkle has been teaching herself to transform into a strange, hollow pig. She’s too round to walk, just awkwardly squirming and rolling. It seems she’s already suffered an injury from this ill-thought-out plan, as she sports a large gouge on her back.

Nobody knows what’s inside her. We’re all too afraid to look.

Skin Hoodie

Why settle for Twilight being your friend, when Twilight could be your you? In this shape, putting Princess Twilight Sparkle onto your body lets her control your every movement. Take a break and allow Princess Twilight Sparkle to take care of your everyday needs! She knows what’s good for you, so relax and know you are in the best of hands! But how are you going to get her off when you’re done, you ask? Well, don’t worry about that! It’ll be fine. No problem!

Backpack

Aw, how cute! Princess Twilight Sparkle has been working on this one ever since Apple Bloom moved on to high school. Now if she has too many school supplies, Princess Twilight Sparkle flies over to her house and transfigures herself into a backpack that Apple Bloom can wear! And since she still has her wings, she can just fly that little Apple kid around anywhere! Ha ha, don’t drop her!

Cupcake

What’s better than a delicious treat? One that’s your best friend, that’s what! Yes, Princess Twilight Sparkle has transformed her own head into a giant cupcake. Just for you! Mind you that she still feels pain in this form, so don’t take too big of a bite! Or any bite at all, really. No, this wasn’t a very good idea. Let’s move on.

Metal

Okay, this one works out better. Princess Twilight Sparkle transformed herself to be made out of solid metal! Now she’s impervious to harm, so you can do basically whatever with her and she’ll be fine! Unfortunately now she cannot feel anything, or speak, or even move. She just sits there. Not blinking. Not breathing. Totally inanimate. It’s terrifying! One cannot imagine existence so utterly trapped within one’s own body. God help her.

Worm

Ha ha, worm time! Princess Twilight Sparkle is crazy for worms. Just nuts about ‘em! She’ll talk your ear off about worms if you get the chance. So the idea occurred to her: wouldn’t life be better if she was a worm? So she changed herself – and she was right! Everything just seemed to come easier to her as a worm, and all her friends agreed that she was more relaxed and pleasant to be around! Wow, Princess Twilight Sparkle sure seems happy being a worm! It was just what she was meant to be.

Tote Bag

Aw, how cute! Princess Twilight Sparkle has been working on this one ever since Apple Bloom moved out to her own home. Now if she has too many groceries, Princess Twilight Sparkle flies over to her house and transfigures herself into a tote that Apple Bloom can carry around! She doesn’t have wings though, so this form is objectively worse than her previous form and Apple Bloom is really getting terrified by Princess Twilight Sparkle’s behavior. Ha ha, don’t drop her!

Squishy

Uh oh! Looks like tampering in God’s domain has caused Princess Twilight Sparkle to suffer some permanent after effects! Now instead of being a normally proportioned pony, Princess Twilight Sparkle’s base form is this soft, mal-proportioned monstrosity! She hasn’t been able to change back to normal no matter how hard she’s tried, so we guess she’s stuck this way forever! Sorry about that, Princess Twilight Sparkle! You played God and lost!

Be the first to leave a comment. Don’t be shy.

Join the Discussion

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.